Building Resilience, Financial Independence, and Student Success: Highlights from Our Podcast with COPE
- Dr. John Lee and Emilia Kasprzak
- Nov 20, 2024
- 10 min read
Updated: Jan 25
Co-authored by Dr. John Lee, clinical psychologist, and Emilia Kasprzak, Operations Manager and 2nd year PNB Student, McMaster University
Recently, we had the privilege of joining the COPE IRL podcast, hosted by Maya and Grace, to discuss topics close to our hearts: building resilience, achieving financial independence, and fostering student success. COPE (Community Outreach for Psychological Empowerment) is a McMaster University initiative dedicated to creating safe, supportive spaces for students to discuss mental health and thrive in their personal and professional lives. Their mission to raise awareness about mental health and empower students aligns deeply with our own values.
As a clinical psychologist (Dr. Lee) and a psychology student (Emilia), we are both passionate about helping people understand human behaviour, shift their mindsets, and implement practical strategies for growth. During the podcast, we touched on themes such as navigating stress, making informed financial decisions, and embracing opportunities for career advancement. In this blog, we reflect on some of the most impactful moments and share insights that we hope will inspire others.
Moving Beyond Coping: Building Resilience
"Coping is definitely really important—we do that in our clinical practice. But I think what's important in psychological treatment is to move beyond coping and to really get at root issues. Sometimes the idea of coping can have a defensive kind of framework…But there's a lot of empowerment in how we respond to events as opposed to just focusing on coping.” – Dr. Lee
Dr. Lee’s Perspective: Coping is an essential skill, but it’s only a stepping stone. True resilience comes from moving beyond coping to address root issues. As I shared on the podcast, stoic philosophy emphasizes focusing on what we can control while accepting what we cannot—allowing us to grow through challenges rather than simply enduring them.
In my own life, I’ve faced moments in the past when everything felt overwhelming and out of control. It was easy to fall into a victim mindset, asking, "Why is this happening to me?" I coped by numbing the pain with distractions, but it left me feeling powerless and stuck. The turning point came when I shifted my focus to what I could control—my responses and actions. Instead of asking, "Why me?" I started asking, "What can I learn from this? How can I grow through this?" This mindset didn’t solve my problems overnight, but it gave me clarity, strength, and the intention to rebuild. Over time, I developed a deeper sense of resilience and regained control over my life.
Emilia’s Perspective: As a student, I often juggle academic deadlines, work responsibilities, extracurricular activities, and social obligations. Amidst all of this, it’s easy to confuse coping with truly addressing the root causes of our stress. Dr. Lee’s perspective has helped me understand that coping can sometimes keep us in a reactive mode—focused on enduring rather than resolving challenges.
Applying this to stress means shifting from merely managing the chaos to actively addressing its causes. Instead of thinking, “I just need to get through this exam season,” I now ask myself, “What systems or habits can I put in place to prevent this kind of stress in the future?” This proactive mindset transforms challenges into opportunities for growth, empowering me to build resilience rather than being stuck in a cycle of survival. By addressing stress at its source, I’ve found a way to move beyond temporary relief and create lasting change.
Financial Independence: Building Freedom and Choice
“The thing about financial independence is actually not about the money. It's the freedom it buys you - you're really buying time and choice…it's not about chasing a dollar figure or the money. It's really about improving your quality of life.” …
“[The key for young people is] .. not waiting until you feel like you have the money to invest….it's just practicing that muscle to start investing… I think the mindset is to not wait to actually go for it. Just do it. If you do it before you use that money for anything else - it's called paying yourself first. So you're investing in yourself first, and that money you use to invest is not even part of the equation for the rest of your budget.” - Dr. Lee
Emilia and Dr. Lee explain what an Index Fund is
Dr. Lee’s Perspective: Financial independence is about more than building wealth—it’s about creating freedom and choice in your life. It allows you to prioritize what truly matters, whether that’s spending time with loved ones, pursuing meaningful work, or gaining peace of mind. Rather than chasing a dollar figure, financial independence focuses on achieving stability and autonomy, empowering you to live on your own terms.
For young people, the key to achieving this is starting early, even with small investments. The sooner you begin, the more you can leverage the power of compound interest to grow your savings over time. With the availability of practice accounts, commission-free trading apps, low-cost index ETFs, and automated investing tools, it’s never been easier to start building financial security in a straightforward and accessible way.
When I learned Emilia was already investing wisely through her TFSA and had hands-on experience managing her investments, I was frankly amazed. It’s rare to see young people taking such proactive steps toward their financial future. I didn’t start investing until I was 29—better late than never—but starting earlier makes a huge difference. Investing young builds both financial security and confidence. I can see how Emilia’s diligence in this area translates into a sense of inner confidence and empowerment over her ability to design her life. If you’re waiting for the “right time,” this is your sign to start. Open a practice account, try a commission-free trading app, or set up a small recurring contribution. The sooner you begin, the closer you’ll be to financial independence. Start today—your future self will thank you.
Emilia's Perspective:
Dr. Lee’s perspective on financial independence resonates deeply with how I view the relationship between money, time, and freedom- his vision and personal expertise in the niche topic of financial psychology is something that really drew me to his practice. To me, financial independence isn’t just about accumulating wealth- it’s about creating a life where time isn’t traded for a wage but instead becomes a resource to spend intentionally. It’s about making your money work for you, such as through investments, so your income is no longer tied solely to your active effort. Passive income, whether through dividends, real estate or an online side hustle, allows for this detachment from the traditional time-for-money equation.
I’ve always been passionate about managing my personal finances and during the pandemic, a time of financial scrutiny, I took it upon myself to learn as much as I could about investing and truly “paid myself first.” As a student, I strongly believe that fostering a healthy relationship with money through investing is critical especially in your 20’s. It’s not about waiting until you have extra money but about prioritizing yourself and your future, keeping track of your finances, and working with what you have in the moment whether it’s investing $100 a month or more. You can set up automatic contributions into your TFSA account, set up a percentage or dollar amount off each pay check to be automatically put into different accounts (chequing, savings, TFSA, FHSA etc.), set up recurring investments and DRIP to really “set it and forget it.” This approach not only builds wealth but also strengthens the mindset of valuing freedom and long-term quality of life over short-term spending. Financial independence is ultimately about creating options, having the freedom to choose how time is spent and to focus on learning about what truly matters to you.
Social Comparisons and the Psychology of Money
“I think one of the big things is social comparison. Back in the day, it would be your neighbour who maybe got a new car or something, and that would make you feel a bit envious. But now you could be envious of somebody across the world through social media…I think being aware of FOMO…social comparisons, how they influence your spending is really important….People often feel like they never have enough. They tell themselves, if I just get this house or reach this income level, then I'll be happy. And what we find is that's their new baseline. So it's like you're running on a hamster wheel. So if you can get out of that loop, short circuit it, and not be prone to comparing yourself to others, I think that's a huge obstacle that you can overcome.” - Dr. Lee
"I tend to limit my social media usage [to about 1 hour per day] which I think is a great tip for reducing that anxiety about starting to invest [and in general]. There's so much information out there on TikTok or on Instagram…. I think it's important to realize that unconsciously when you're scrolling, you're comparing yourself to these other people and taking in all of their media. It's important to take a step back, just realize where you are, and do your own research before you actually rip the band aid off and start investing.” - Emilia
Dr. Lee speaks on the meaning of financial independence
Dr. Lee’s Perspective: Financial psychology goes beyond numbers—it’s about understanding how emotions like fear and greed can shape our decisions. If you ask me what core psychological issue seems to derail people’s financial health, it’s FOMO and social comparisons. This leads to overspending, lack of financial discipline, and impulsive decisions. By having strong core values, you can innoculate yourself from the dangers of comparisons.
Emilia's Perspective: Dr. Lee’s perspective on the "hamster wheel" of social comparison is highly relevant to students, especially with the prevalence of phone addiction and the constant craving for dopamine through social media scrolling. This cycle often leads to chasing external milestones, such as better grades or an idealized student lifestyle, in the belief that achieving them will bring fulfillment, when in reality a lot of the times, may only result in dissatisfaction when a new baseline is established. Social media amplifies this by creating endless opportunities for unconscious comparison, whether it’s seeing someone with a higher GPA, a prestigious internship, or a seemingly stress-free life.
Limiting social media usage, such as reducing screen time to about an hour a day, can be a powerful strategy to counteract this cycle. Stepping away from constant scrolling allows for a focus on personal goals and values rather than superficial comparisons. Breaking free from the dopamine-driven loop of social media not only improves mental clarity but also encourages genuine satisfaction and balance in student life. Being aware and intentional about these habits are truly the first steps in fostering a healthier and more grounded mindset.
Career Growth: Taking Risks and Embracing Rejection
“So I remember being so nervous because I saw Dr. Lee and everyone at the practice on TikTok, and I was like, oh my gosh. This looks so perfect. It looks like such a great, fun, cohesive environment. So I [told myself] I should just go for it. Because realistically, at the time, I didn't really have anything to lose. The worst that anyone could say to you was no. So I think just being okay with being rejected, which I think can be hard, and just realizing that ultimately the benefits outweigh your fear or stress that you may have with cold emailing. So I just went for it, and here I am now. So I think that sort of slogan or phrase, just go for it, is definitely great.
I would just say to really express your passion, and how your skills and background align and could contribute positively to the work that you're doing to whoever you're cold emailing. And just showing your passion for the work, I think, is important to show that you'd be a great fit and show how you would support them in their work.” - Emilia
Emilia’s Perspective: The fear of rejection often holds people back, even when the potential consequences of rejection are minimal, for instance in applying for research positions or extracurricular activities. This fear is deeply rooted in the need for social approval and belonging, but it can prevent valuable opportunities. From my perspective, adopting the mindset of "just rip off the band-aid" is about reframing rejection not as a personal failure but as a step toward growth.
Applying to work at Dr. Lee’s practice was intimidating, especially after seeing the environment on TikTok. It can be easy to feel unqualified or fear being told “no”, but ultimately, embracing the idea that the worst possible outcome was a simple "no" can help reframe the situation. There are so many opportunities out there and it's okay, the world doesn't stop spinning if you don't get that exact one- its part of the learning process. Instead focus on fear and switching your focus to the potential benefits: opportunities for learning, growth, and experience.
"Just go for it" or “rip the bandaid off” aren't just motivational phrases; they are reminders to take action despite discomfort. The potential rewards of stepping outside a comfort zone often far outweigh the temporary sting of rejection.
Dr. Lee’s Perspective: Emilia’s story is a great example of how success often comes down to timing, luck, and the courage to take a chance. When I was a student, I had to put myself out there—cold emailing professors, asking questions, and trying to stand out. Rejection was a constant fear, but I learned it’s just part of the process. Every “no” brings you closer to a “yes,” and that yes can open doors you never imagined.
Emilia’s email showed genuine passion and a clear understanding of how she could contribute to our work. Since joining, she’s been an incredible asset, bringing creativity, initiative, and immeasurable value to the team. Her story proves that stepping out of your comfort zone is worth it. Rejection isn’t failure—it’s growth. If you’re on the fence about taking a leap, just go for it. The rewards far outweigh the fear.
Conclusion
Our discussion on COPE’s podcast touched on building resilience, taking control of your financial future, and seizing opportunities for growth. Whether it’s learning to move beyond coping, starting to invest early, or overcoming fear of rejection, small, intentional steps can lead to meaningful change.
If you’re feeling inspired, consider reflecting on how you can apply these ideas in your own life. Start by identifying one area where you’d like to grow—whether it’s managing stress, building financial confidence, or taking a risk in your career—and take that first step.
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